You'll Be The Dust of The Room

I know this is a couple of weeks after the fact, but I wanted to write a bit about the group art show my friends and I put on called The Alchemy Archives. It was the second installment by our group, which we call the Upper Six Hundreds, and it absolutely topped our previous show. We spent a lot more time, effort, and money with the latest exhibition and it paid off. The evening went of with out much of hitch. There was costumes, artwork, movie, live music, sets, and so much more than I could possibly try to sum up. Below are pictures that do it a little better justice, but still not nearly enough as seeing it all in person. We're starting to talk about plans for our third, in which case, I encourage you all to attend.









You can view more photos I took from the show here. My good friend Fuser, also part of the Upper Six Hundreds, has also posted a set of his photos here too.

Hold The Way

I know I've written about Grouper (Liz Harris) once before, after first discovering last year's Dragging A Dead Deer Up A Hill. However, since then she's really come to dominate my musical likings. With 2009 nearing a close, the inevitable list of albums I'll be putting together to compromise my list of Favorite Albums of The Decade has been ever-present in my mind. In examining my listening trends, I realize nothing has quite topped her album in the last ten years (though some have come close, mainly Interpol's Turn On The Bright Lights from 2002). In anticipation of what her forthcoming new music might behold, I've been seeking out all the other releases she's put out prior to Dragging, which include two prior full-lengths and a handful of 7"s and split-releases with other like-minded acts.


What's so engaging about Grouper is the space she provides in her actual music. Often her songs are nothing more than a couple of distant melodies that are repeatedly piled atop one another to the point where they reach this ethereal calm. Without sounding like a total sap, my absolute favorite way to experience her music is late at night, driving around alone on usually-busy streets that become dark and desolate by midnight. It takes me to a place where I can fixate and reflect without distraction, like the occasions in which you're in a dialog with someone and you lose focus and end up staring at some inanimate object unknowingly before being snapped back into the realm of full-attention. It's the best way I can describe it. Try it sometime.

Here's a video of her newest song, “Hold The Way”, which is slated to be released as part of an EP whose full details are yet to be announced. It captures the haunting feeling pretty accurately, but stylistically shows how she's varying her sound in a slightly new direction. The video itself is pretty stunning. It should be noted that the meat of the song doesn't kick in until a minute or two in.



Even if you don't quite like it, I still suggest you give Dragging A Dead Dear Up A Hill a real whirl. Its effects are like few I've felt before. Here's a nice fan-made video for one of the actual album tracks, “Heavy Water/I'd Rather Be Sleeping,” which I never seem to get sick of hearing.



Grouper is made up just one woman, Liz Harris, and she is based out of Portland. If you like her music, please support it the right way. Here's her MySpace and her Blog.

You Know Someday You'll Slow

Days are bleeding into weeks then months then years, and I am watching it all accelerate and just shaking my head a bit in simple acknowledgement that there's nothing I can do about it. I've wasted so much of my time and energy holding onto things, or people rather, I should've just walked away from upon first sign of negligence. Unfortunately I didn't, and now I'm starting to really see how wasteful I've been with my days. Life's too fucking short to let anyone treat you like a possibility, or an option – so don't do it. People have factored me like so, and to be honest, I've done the same to others. Nobody should lack respect for themselves to that capacity – to let another dictate your relevance in their life. In all fairness, in a lot of my own circumstances, I've knowingly chosen to take on the role of being someone else's doormat or personal esteem-boost. Today though, I seem to be latching onto more of a third-person's view of how my naively idealistic and romantically-skewed dedication has stalled me from being at the place in my life I'd hoped to be at by this age.

Long story short, I've always known I've wanted to be a father and, now at 29, for the first time ever, I'm starting to see that the window of opportunity actually has an expiration date. I'm thinking in terms of practicality for a future where I'm not so old that I can't relate to my children. I don't want to be 40 and having my first child. No offense to anyone who is around that age, or had parents who were when they were born. I just want to be a fun Dad, the kind who can still goof off and chase the kids around the house without having to stop to catch my breath. I've always known, without much doubt, that I'd want kids someday. Maybe it's overcompensation for the experiences my Dad was too busy to provide toward me - but aside all that, I just really think I'd be good at it, you know?

So now, approaching 30 in less than a year, I'm starting to feel the tick of the clock. I want to build a relationship that I can trust before I get married. I hate to set specifics on it, but I can't really imagine proposing to someone who I've been with for less than two years. I'm not saying I wouldn't propose sooner if I absolutely knew the person was the end-all-be-all of my life. However, the last thing I ever want is a divorce, so I think a couple years together isn't an unfair expectation to ensure a true commitment to a marriage. If I was to get married, I also would want to spend a couple years just really spending time with my wife - just the two of us, traveling about and living up our fleeting days of true youth before deciding to dedicate our time and energy towards a family. So, that all being said, in the instance I met my future wife tomorrow, by the time we'd get married and had our first child, I'd be somewhere near 35. If she's on the same agenda as I am, she'd hopefully want a second - putting us somewhere near the end of our 30's, start of our 40's.

Anyways, I know all this timeline plotting ruins the spontaneity and builds expectations, but I'd be foolish to just cast it all to the wind. I guess I've just come to the conclusion that my over-the-top (and narrow-focused) romanticism may be what's actually causing my delay in meeting someone who I could feasibly spend the rest of my life with.

I used to abhor the idea of ever “settling” for someone. Even typing it out now, I still don't think I ever could marry someone I wasn't 100% sure of being “the one.” However, I've built up this bullshit criteria in my head that's kept me from actually giving some people a real shot. I've let something like music, my biggest passion in life, be the basis of which I assume personal compatibility. It's a fucking joke if you really think about it. I'm not going to lie and say there isn't this huge part of me that feels music is the strongest way I can relate to others, but to let that dominate my assessment of someone's character - it's like, where the fuck do I get off? Do I really think that my life with someone who I couldn't listen to records with would somehow negate all the other things I could share with them - like a family and a home?

Maybe I'm getting too John Cusack at the end of High Fidelity right now, but it's coming from a real place of self-questioning. Last week I put my first offer on an actual home I was hoping to buy (it ended up being sold to another buyer who offered all cash upfront). Walking around inside of it, I could start to see all the puzzle pieces fitting together – I just wished I had someone there with me who I knew I would be sharing it with.

All I know is that I'm not wasting any more time waiting on people who can't decide what they want out of life. For the young, don't stress yourself out over it - you'll find your own place in due time. For those in similar positions - I wish you luck in taking hold over the time you have, even if it means walking away from someone you told yourself you'd wait forever for. In the end, if forever is how long they'd make you wait, clearly their agenda never had you in mind at all.

Sorry for the weight of the post.

Some Things I Fear Never Will Be

They've done it once again, and I am rendered completely envious.



Somewhere in Seoul, someone is suddenly feeling a bit restless by the lyrical connection to this song.

Night Walks With Me

For any of you in the Southern California area, tomorrow night (Saturday October 24th) will be the reception for the newest installment of our group art exhibitions, this time called The Alchemy Archives. It absolutely blows away our last show, which I'd posted about previously. We've spent a lot more time, energy and money on this newest one and it's going to be an event that you shouldn't afford yourself to miss. There will be art, music, films, absinthe fairies, a futurist, an oddities display collection, costumes, crafts and drinks (did I mention absinthe?). I will certainly follow-up with a more elaborate post documenting the madness that will likely ensue. For those of you interested, below is the flyer outlining all the information. Drop me a line if you do plan on attending. It's open to the public and there is a $5 suggested donation at the door, which gets you a drink ticket and access to all the corridors. Attendants are encouraged to come costumed, but not required by any means. The whole event is themed in a turn-of-the-century, London Fog, steampunk, Jack The Ripper, German expressionistic feel.

Body Next To Another

And this new song, “The Ocean”, by Tegan and Sara is my favorite off their soon-to-be-released album Sainthood (which is currently dominating my car stereo).



And the live version...



What gets me the most is the line that makes up the chorus, It's been so long since you've said, “Well, I know what I want and what I want is right here with you.“

Yes, I really do like Tegan & Sara. There's only so much darkness and mystery one can shroud themselves in. Sometimes I need a pop fix – deal with it.

Keep Your Eyes Ahead

It's a done deal. I'm 29, and I'm feeling quite alright about it. I spent Thursday night thru Sunday morning in Portland, Oregon with my two best friends, William & Brandie Hart. It was my third time visiting Portland within the last 10 or so years, and it was by far the best experience I've had thus far. Will & Brandie moved up there earlier this year, much to my playful objection, and as a result my bitterness toward the city that stole them away had increased. However, having experienced it through their hands, I've gained a much great appreciation for it.

On Thursday, we hit up the Doug Fir lounge to catch The Depreciation Guild and arrived early enough to see Warpaint play a great opening set of their brand of Los Angeles ethereal jams. The highlight of their set was the tune “Billie Holiday” that sounded like a female-sung Grizzly Bear treatment. The Depreciation Guild soon followed and played another great set that was on par with the one I'd seen a few weeks earlier when they were in Los Angeles supporting The Pains of Being Pure at Heart.

(Warpaint live at Doug Fir Lounge)

(The Depreciation Guild live at Doug Fir Lounge)

We high-tailed it out of the Doug Fir to satisfy our stomachs, and stuffed ourselves with delicious eats from the local food carts Brandie & Will had spoken so highly of. The food cart "scene" is pretty awesome in Portland and seems like a growing industry for young people who don't have either the time or investments to establish a full-fledged restaurant. Following our late dinner, we drove around a bit and the Harts gave me a pre-tour of the town during the late hours.

Friday morning, we got up pretty early and ate breakfast at one of the best restaurants I've been to. It's called Gravy, and thanks to their notoriety for big meal portions and incredible dishes, there was a line to get in that stole away a good 30 mins of our adventure time. However, after experiencing one of their omelettes, I can assuredly say it was well worth the wait. Following breakfast, we occupied the remainder of the day and evening hitting up every interesting retailer in the area. From the amazing four-story Powell's Books to Jackpot Records to half a dozen antique stores and vintage shops, I was treated to the full-spectrum of sold-goods in Portland. By the time we wrapped up our shopping excursion, I had 6 books, 2 records, an antique owl desk-bell, half a dozen various print decor pieces for my apartment and a beautiful marble-red Italian Stiletto switchblade that I'd long been dreaming of owning.

(Will & Brandie being coffee addicts at Gravy)

(Will trying to get a piggy-back ride from Brandie at Powell's Books)

We finished off the night with some amazing pizza from a place called Scholl's, followed by a quick jaunt thru an old school that was converted into a hotel, whose bottom floor had various rooms that housed different themed bars. It was definitely one of the most interesting establishments I'd visited while there. We arrived back at the Hart's home before midnight and spent the last hour of my 28th year watching a random Coffin Joe movie on the television. When the clock struck midnight, they wished me a Happy Birthday and a minute or two later I received an unanticipated phone call from someone quite dear to me.

For my birthday, aside from the amazing box of gifts filled with all sorts of great trinkets, antiques and books they'd given me when I woke up, Will & Brandie proposed taking me to Astoria (two hours Northwest of Portland) to visit the various landmarks that were featured in my favorite childhood movie, The Goonies. It was a symbolic gift that few other people in my life would ever think to do for me. I'm an absolute Goonie at heart, so it really did help curb the doom-and-gloom feeling that comes with the knowledge of getting older.

After grabbing bagels and filling up the tank, we hit the road for Astoria. We arrived sometime around noon and immediately headed straight for the sites Brandie had gathered info on from thegoonies.org. First was the jailhouse that the Fratellis broke out of, then the museum where Mikey's Dad worked at, followed by a visit to the actual house that Mikey and Brand lived in (also where Chunk did his famous Truffle Shuffle in front of), we drove past the bowling alley Chunk was seen in briefly, and finally we headed to the Astoria Column (where many of the scenic shots from the movie were taken. Once there, where we climbed up the 164 circular-stairs to the top of the column and launched off styrofoam gliders that Will & Brandie purchased at the gift shop. Oh, and to emphasize the Goonie-quality of it all, we munched on Baby Ruth candy bars while taking in the amazing view of the area. We concluded the trip to Astoria by visiting the Peter Iredale Shipwreck and running around the sand dunes off its shore.

(Fratelli's Jail House from The Goonies)

(Inside the Flavel House Museum)

(Brandie & Will in front of the Goonies house driveway -
the middle of the sign reads “Goonies on foot welcome”)

(The Goonies House!)

(Brandie & Will launching their flyers off the top of Astoria Column)

(Will & Brandie at the dunes in Astoria)

The whole experience was far greater than I am conveying here, but in an effort to not go into to much detail, you'll have to accompany this summary with the full set of photos I've posted from the trip here.

We left Astoria and arrived back in Portland in time for some dinner at Dots Cafe (which is really more of a bar) where I scarfed down an amazing Vegan Medley, and a last minute pit-stop at Pix Patisserie for some macaroons. We landed back at the Hart's house where we wrapped up the night with some RoboCop and the realization that my 7:10AM flight back home meant we'd have to be up in a few hours. We all crashed after midnight, and woke up again at around 5:00AM. I packed all my stuff, headed to the airport, said our good-byes and I was back in my apartment in LA by 9:30AM.

The trip was brief, but Will & Brandie made the most of it with me and maximized it to the fullest. It's a weekend I won't soon forget and the best possible way I could've hoped to spend my 29th.

(29 ain't so bad)